Explanation

Several scenarios are presented in this section. Each scenario is followed by Stimulus questions related to this scenario. In order to stimulate group discussion, you will find a section with broader questions on the topic. A final Key message is available to complete the activity.

Educational objectives

Recognize different types of approaches when attempting seduction in adolescence.
Evaluate the appropriateness of different seduction methods in adolescence.
Become aware of the importance of a seduction full of respect, originality, and indulgence linked to inexperience in adolescence and representative of each person's personality.

In order to get young people thinking, you will have to print out the scenarios in order to have them in different places on your premises in order to create stations. There are 5 scenarios on the theme of seduction.

Progress

Before the activity

Read the scenarios and select them appropriately according to the distinctions specific of your youth group.
Read the questions and the Key message.
Provide the necessary material for carrying out the activity.
Print the scenarios and the questions.
Prepare the stations (1 station = posts-it, pencils, 1 scenario).
Plan rules of conduct that the youth will have to respect (eg, speaking out, respect for others, respect for oneself, etc.)

During the activity

You must divide the participants into teams (create the number of teams equivalent to the number of scenarios).
Each team starts at a station.
In a small group, they read the presented scenario and the questions. They discuss it and write the answers on post-its.
They stick the post-its, next to the scenario.
After about 5 to 10 minutes, when all the teams have completed their station, they change stations.
When the teams have completed all the stations, you can sit them in a large group.
You return to the 4 scenarios and the answers written on the post-its.
You ask the Stimulus questions in a large group and lead a discussion.
You finish the workshop with the Key message.

After the activity

You can leave the stations (scenarios and posts-it) on the wall to create murals with the young people's answers.

Equipment

Post-it
Stopwatch (cell phone, Clock)
Pencils
Printed scenarios and questions
Printed Stimulus questions for the plenary
Printed Key message for the plenary

Cost-saving alternative

You can take draft sheets of paper and cut them out. In this alternative, the papers will replace the post-its. However, you will need some stickers or tape for the participants to place their papers on the wall.

Alain, who is a youth host, asks a question to the group of young people present that night: " When a boy or girl is interested in someone, how does he or she tell the other person? "

Alicia was quick to answer this: " When two people are seduced, they will spend time together at school, with their friends, chatting, laughing, and so on. These people will create a bond of friendship first. Then, gradually, find ways to make other understand that they like them. That's how it starts"

Questions

What do you think of Alicia's answer?
In your opinion, does this way of doing things correspond to what young people your age live? What is similar and what is different?
Finally, is this a good way to seduce the other?

Key message

Do not forget that seduction is as simple as taking your time, sharing moments together, becoming increasingly complicit.

* To select with young people aged 15 and over *

Alain, who is a host at the ‘Maison des jeunes’, asks a question to the group of young people present that night: " When a boy or girl is interested in someone, how does he or she tell the other person?''.

Marie answered this: "There's not a day when I do not hear a guy at my school say, for example, a girl who walks in the hallway: "Is fucking hot". For guys, it's more physical and sexual. Before, they were more likely to say, "You're beautiful". Now it's more vulgar, they do not make compliments anymore; it seems that there is no more love. ".

Questions

What do you think of Marie's answer?
In your opinion, does this way of doing things correspond to what young people your age experience? What is similar and what is different?
Finally, is this a good way to seduce the other?

Key message

Do not forget that a compliment is a good way to show interest in someone while remaining polite! Politeness, aside from being a form of good manners, is also an excellent means of seduction.

Alain, who is a host at the ‘Maison des jeunes’, asks a question to the group of young people present that night: " When a boy or girl is interested in someone, how does he or she tell the other person? ".

Élodie answered this: "There are people who meet on social networks. They are hiding behind their phone. When you are interested in a person face to face, it's because you like them, but when you do it on social networks, it's really to sleep with the person. People send sexy pictures. All this while hoping that the person is interested in them ".

Questions

What do you think of Élodie's answer?
In your opinion, does this way of doing things correspond to what young people your age experience? What is similar and what is different?
Finally, is this a good way to seduce the other?

Key message

Think about what you are sending to someone to be interested in you. Think about what you want them to remember about you. " Keep yourself a little timid". If it clicks, you will have all the time it takes to discover yourself.

Sebastian answered this: " There are some who meet on the Internet because they are not able to talk face to face, they are too shy. Then, if it clicks, all the better. But you know, how do they do it? Well, they talk to each other, they get to know each other. Of course, it's different than being in front of the other person, but they get to know each other anyway, and then, at best, they meet up. That does not necessarily mean they think only about sex ".

Questions

What do you think of Sebastian's answer?
In your opinion, does this way of doing things correspond to what young people your age experience? What is similar and what is different?
Finally, is this a good way to seduce the other?

Key messages

Do not forget that there is no magical recipe in seduction. There are different ways to get to know each other and find that “special someone” without taking the risk of exposure on the web. Complicity and caution are always very important.

Karim does not want to answer the question. He is too shy to talk about this, even if the subject concerns him. He feels very much in love with Kathy, a girl in his class, but does not know how to approach her. How could she be interested in him? He is neither athletic, nor the best of his class, nor the most popular. Fortunately, he has a good sense of humour. He fears that his gang does not approve of his choice and teases him.

Questions

What do you think of what Karim experiences?
What seems difficult for Karim?
What would you advise to Karim or any other young person who doubts their ability to meet someone?

Key message

Do not forget that you do not have to be the most popular of the school to please someone. Just be yourself - even when you are shy - and bet on your strengths and qualities!

Stimulus questions

Are these the same ways to seduce that are valued by girls and boys? What is similar and what is different?
What about when the seduction game is between two girls or between two boys? What is similar and what can be different?
In your opinion, how can we seduce someone we like at your age?
Could you give examples of "seduction" scenarios for young people of your age ( Warning! we are not in Hollywood or on a reality show!!!). Cool scenarios that work (when seduction carries us) and scenarios that may not work (when seduction derails).

Key messages

Seduction, when it carries us:

It's nice, it's charming, it's refreshing, it's funny, it's in stages, it's respectful, it's original, it gives us wings, it carries us. The two people enjoy meeting each other, getting accustomed to each other, getting to know each other better. It's great!

Seduction, when it derails:

We feel that it is only to prove to others, even to friends, that we can seduce anyone. It can be a stereotypical or sexist way of addressing the other, it can become sexual too quickly, it creates discomfort, it is too insistent, it is inappropriate, the other can feel used or trapped. Finally, it becomes disturbing, even invasive. Moreover, it is important to distinguish between flirting and a situation of harassment (see the Seduction Quiz).

In Closing...

It is quite possible that your first experiences of seduction are not up to your expectations. It is also very likely that this person who pleases you is not the one with whom you will be in a relationship for the rest of your life. Do we not talk about the "seduction game"? This is not a reason not to be pleasant in your "seduction techniques". Make sure that others remember you as a "good", "honest", "funny", "original" or "nice" person and not someone who has used the other person to showcase themselves or to achieve their ends. Some people just like the idea of "seducing" to get attention. For many others, seduction is a step to get to know each other better... .